Just posted in my private diary. As usual the words flowed easily. There was no self consciousness, no nervous editing while I was doing the writing. I listened to music and just let words flow out, enjoying myself. The finished post was rough but OK. I like the raw energy that comes out in this diary. I'm surprised when I go back and find sentences that are direct, simple, full of colour. The writing still stands after coming out in a rush, without any neurotic editing and re-editing.
I always go back to the diary posts later and do some edits. I do this as part of the fiction writing process. Learning to create sentences that are tight and clear. But the original out pour is always easy.
Of course the diary posts will never be made public.
When I write fiction I know it won't be sent into the public arena until I'm ready. I can always press the delete button. But still, for some reason, I tighten up and worry when I sit to do the 'serious' writing.
As a fiction experiment this afternoon I'm going to write out the alien story I've been stuck on. I'm going to pretend to be each of the characters and quickly jot down their journal entries. I'll think about how that person/alien is feeling. Try to get right inside their heads (or whatever some aliens have). See if a story outline suggests itself.